Yesterday went to see my dad alone struggling to fulfill his last wish, he said: shaking his left hand helplessly in the air "bring me home" My heart broke and quickly held his hand which he squeezed so tightly and refused to let me go. I have to slowly release my hand as it was burning hot becoz of the 'chilli padi' I handle earlier. I have to literally gave him a hand towl to hold. Poor dad... sob.. I can see you suffered in pains and asking me to bring you home. I was crying so bitterly in front of him and told Kimsan about it. He suggested that I tell my bros about it and bring my dad to our house. I told Jeff about it and they are still defending themselves that becoz of his "cough and breathlessness" that they have no choice but to leave him in hospice. Hey! when I was there the whole afternoon and even ran to the nurse station for help the doctor told me that they have new cases and will attend to my dad later. Hey! none came despites of me asking so many times. I would think that is the same as leaving him at home even though we are inexperience, but at least 'home care' is better and most importantly we have met his last wish. Sob...sob...!! Poor Dad... kimsan and I wants to bring you to our house but I still need the consent of my bros which he said he will discuss about it. *beam...beam* still no news!!

This whole incident reflects to me that "why HIM" as he could have become embittered and self-pitying in the face of his disease, but he maintained a grateful attitude. "If I asked again, 'Why him?' what about his past troubles, I would have to ask, 'Why him?' about his blessings. Why his winning goals and marrying a beautiful woman and having so many wonderful children?" and all his blessings he had during his struggles working so hard for the family and savings.

And what about his spiritual blessings? We can hold the very Word of God in our hands and read it. We have the knowledge of His saving grace, the comfort of His Spirit, and the joyful assurance of life everlasting with Jesus. Praise God you have saved my dad!